On Turning 31, or Reflections on My 30th Year and Realizing This Is Gonna Be An Awesome Decade

On Turning 31, or Reflections on My 30th Year and Realizing This Is Gonna Be An Awesome Decade

This time last year, I wrote a post about my anxiety about turning 30.  My birthday is next week, and I’m happy to report that I survived my first year of this new decade!

30th birthday
My friends decorated my workspace last year for my 30th birthday because they are The Best™

A lot of the goals and life skills that I had begun to set in motion at this point last year have solidified into some Real Adult Habits and Practices.

Continue reading “On Turning 31, or Reflections on My 30th Year and Realizing This Is Gonna Be An Awesome Decade”

On My New Normal, or Moving On After My Divorce

On My New Normal, or Moving On After My Divorce

It has now been one year and eight months since shit began to hit the fan with my marriage.

Next month, it will be one year since my divorce was finalized.

I moved halfway across the country and began a new job one year and three months ago.

I moved into my current, cozy little studio apartment with my dumpstercat Chet one year ago this week.

I began casually dating eight months ago, convinced that I wanted to “play the field” and try out “ethical non-monogamy.”

About five months ago, I began dating this super cool guy, and about three months ago, I realized that I had no interest in non-monogamy or “playing the field” anymore and I was perfectly content to be in a “real” relationship again.  No anxiety about what I could be missing, etc.  And no weird residual hangups about my divorce.  It’s pretty awesome.

I have settled into my new life.  My New Normal.  Nestled into the cozy reliability of a routine, a steady paycheck, a great health insurance plan (for now…), a place of my own, and reliable snuggles.

Continue reading “On My New Normal, or Moving On After My Divorce”

On Being A Woman Who Doesn’t Want Children, or How Puppy Sitting Made Me Even More Aware of My Selfish and Un-nurturing Nature

On Being A Woman Who Doesn’t Want Children, or How Puppy Sitting Made Me Even More Aware of My Selfish and Un-nurturing Nature

Preface: I’m pretty adamant about the fact that I don’t want to have kids, and I will be discussing these thoughts and feelings in this post. It does not mean I think poorly of those who do, who want to, or who wish they could have children. These are only my own personal beliefs and they are not meant to hurt anyone in any way. 



When I started college twelve years ago as an 18 year old freshman, I was given an assignment: write a letter to my future self, outlining where I saw myself at graduation and then my 10 year plan.

As a freshman, I planned on focusing on musical theatre performance, perhaps taking some classes in education. I wanted to run a musical theatre company for youth similar to the one I attended as a homeschooler throughout high school.

So that meant I would graduate with my musical theatre focused degree at age 22.

By age 24 or maybe 25 at the latest, I would be married to a wonderful guy.

And a couple years after that at 26 or 27, I would have my first kid. My second would follow a couple years later, so I would have my intended two children by the time I was 30.

I’m now 30, and the only thing that happened in that 10 year plan was “I graduated with some sort of degree at age 22.”

And I did get married, but it was to a woman.

And that marriage was over by the time I hit 30.

And now, I don’t even want any of that.

Let’s back up.

Continue reading “On Being A Woman Who Doesn’t Want Children, or How Puppy Sitting Made Me Even More Aware of My Selfish and Un-nurturing Nature”